Correspondence With A 7yr Old

October 17, 2015

I was scrounging through emails the other day trying to get a handle on the the monster that used to be my inbox when I came across some back and forth's with a mom and her 7year old daughter who ONLY wanted to wear high heels everyday all day. The mom, concerned with her growing daughters development, and understandably so, wanted to know if that was healthy for her little girl and what to do if it isn't. 

Well, it's not healthy for anyone to wear heels on the daily. It's actually ridiculously awful for long term development and this goes for adults too. The mom already thought as much so good for the mom to ask and she deserves a huge pat on the back for trying to find a way to get her daughter on board with wearing flats more often rather than forcing the kid. 

We came up with a plan that if the little girl heard from me she might listen more than if just the parent said so. Oh the horrors of being a parent....

There's actually a psychological term for this. It's called ?????? (I don't remember) and is based on humans natural tendency that the closer a person is to us the less we think they know. For instance a sister will take the advice of her own physician over the physician that is her sibling almost every time even if the sibling is the better and more qualified physician in every way.

Since these emails I've had this "mom+concern+young lady+high heel" conundrum pop up a handful of times so I figured it makes sense to do a newsletter about it. This is the reply email I've used each time and the feedback would suggest that it's worked well. 

Switch "run and climb" to whatever the kids main interests are.


Dear #####,

The high heel question is very understandable and I'm glad you ask. I think high heels can be very pretty when worn with class. Always go classy.

However, it's hard to run or climb in high heels right?

And whatever we practice often we will get better at right? 

So if we wear high heels often then wouldn't our legs start to stay in the place when we took them off?

And if your legs and feet stayed looking like the high heel, EVEN WHEN we took the high heels OFF, wouldn't that make it harder to run and climb? 

Yeah, so high heels are pretty and good when you're dressing up to go to weddings or special events right?
Yeah, because those don't happen EVERYDAY right? 

But if we were to wear the high heel everyday our foot would start to look like the high heel and then we wouldn't be able to run and climb as well. So that would stink.  

So would it seem like a good idea to keep the high heels special for special occasions and then wear flats for all the other stuff?

I think so. What do you think?  

(Then wait patiently for a response)


This is a simple email, please send this to anyone you know with a little girl whether they're overly into the high heel game or not. And if your'e wearing heels all day everyday....please do your body a favor and get some flats. I assure you, beauty is not an externally based attribute. It's deeply rooted inside all of us, just whether we are courageous enough to get know that side of ourselves or not. 

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